In 1983 or 1984, package holidays were not yet common, and Mallorca was a mix of development and unspoiled terrain. Zoe Williams, then nine, her sister 11, and her mother 46, were early adopters of the all-inclusive getaway, though her mother arrived with a skeptical attitude. She disliked small talk, buffets, boisterous dads, nuclear families, and even other single-parent families. She hated sitting by the pool, drinking piña coladas, group activities, quizzes, and forced fun. In contrast, Zoe and her sister loved forced fun and would get excited over a cocktail umbrella.
Arrival at the Hotel Complex
They arrived at a hotel in Alcúdia, part of a giant complex of identical hotels offering constant entertainment in lizard-friendly temperatures. After one morning in the pool and one lunch sampling non-Spanish delights, their mother decided this was for losers and wanted to discover the 'real' Mallorca. Without a car, they set off on foot in sandals, only Zoe wearing a hat. Sunscreen was not yet common. Zoe carried a little red clutch, hoping to find a charming craft shop.
The Hike Through Building Sites
The only road had no pavement and led to other hotels, so they scrambled over small rocks as hot as a pizza oven, behind a half-finished building with anti-vandal infrastructure. Their mother remarked, 'No wonder we felt like prisoners!' Zoe had not felt like a prisoner; she had enjoyed the kids' club with a zip wire and would have been happy reading a book. They walked for hours over building sites, changing direction at every 'keep out' sign, encountering no real Mallorca or Mallorcans, as builders knew better than to be out in the heat. Their mother hated drinking water, so they became very thirsty. The landscape was parched and barren, with unattended diggers and girders. Their toes were caked in dust, and they could only perceive sunburn by the pain.
Lost and Desperate
To cheer everyone up, their mother began describing a radio play about a care home that turns out to be purgatory; her narration lasted longer than the play itself. They finally reached a hotel that was not theirs, but the staff gave them a lift because they looked dusty and crazed. From the minivan, they probed for some sign that their mother realized the day had been a disaster. She said, 'Tomorrow, we should definitely wear socks.'
