A 17-year-old reader writes to advice columnist Eleanor Gordon-Smith, expressing concern that their aversion to graphic content, alcohol, and relationships reflects immaturity. They feel out of step with peers who seem unbothered by explicit violence or sex in films.
The Reader's Dilemma
The reader, who is 17, describes feeling like a 'sore thumb' among peers due to their sensitivity. They tried watching films with explicit content but felt uncomfortable and retreated to milder media. They worry this limits their psychological development and wonder if they are cowardly or unready for the real world.
Eleanor's Response
Eleanor distinguishes between things one isn't ready for and things one simply doesn't like. For romance or sex, it's fine to not feel ready. For violence, there are ethical questions about enjoying it. She shares her own discomfort with horror films and notes that maturity involves learning to be oneself, not forcing consumption of unwanted content.
She advises the reader to be curious about their feelings and avoid overcompensating by judging others. The goal is acceptance and self-understanding, not forcing change or labeling others.
