For readers under 30, Teletext is a foreign concept—a clunky proto-internet on TV that showed weather, news, and sports. It was a frivolous add-on, but for Ammar Kalia's father, it became the gateway to a holiday from hell. In 2001, his dad used Teletext to book a Caribbean cruise through Thomas Cook, lured by a surprisingly affordable deal. "Well, it was very cheap and we'd never been on a cruise before," his father later explained. "Of course, I didn't know then that we were both going to be seasick for the entire time."
The Voyage Begins in Rough Waters
The trip started as it would continue: in rough seas. Setting sail from northern Spain, the ship headed straight for the choppy Bay of Biscay. Seven-year-old Ammar, unaware of his propensity for nausea, was rudely awakened by colossal waves thrashing the side. On day two, he made it to the breakfast buffet but vomited over the patterned carpet after the floor tilted, putting everyone off their meal.
A Floating Prison with Brief Stops
Most cruises sail through the night and dock in the morning, but their cruise sailed through days and nights, crossing vast oceans, docking only for a few hours. They supposedly stopped at Cuba, the Dominican Republic, and Jamaica, but all Ammar remembers is lying next to his dad, both gripping the sheets, willing the motion to stop. They took turns sticking their heads down the toilet bowl. Meanwhile, his mother and brother enjoyed the "Captain's cocktail hour," flawless beaches in the Dominican Republic, and fresh mojitos in Cuba. They acknowledged the rough seas but blamed the haphazard booking.
Solid Ground at Last
By the final destination in North America, his mother and brother emerged sun-kissed and well-rested, while Ammar was grateful for solid ground, vowing never to get on a boat or let his dad book a holiday—via Teletext or otherwise—again.
